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Mom, I Have Something to Tell You: The Power of a Mother’s Love
Text By Robert Chapman Hill
An intimate new documentary from Gay Sons and Mothers, explores the beautiful and complex relationships between gay sons and the women who raised them. In an exclusive conversation with Handsome™, Alan Locher reflects on coming out, growing up without representation, and the lasting power of a mother’s love.
There are conversations that change the course of our lives. For many gay men, telling their mothers who they truly are is one of them. Sometimes, the words are met with open arms. Other times, silence, uncertainty, or an emotional journey neither person anticipated.
For Alan Locher, creator of The Locher Room, coming out wasn’t a carefully planned announcement. It happened one Sunday morning at the breakfast table, when his mother asked a question that would change the course of his life. Decades later, that experience has brought him to Mom, I Have Something to Tell You, an award-winning documentary premiering free online September 30, 2026, ahead of National Coming Out Month.
The 30-minute documentary is presented by Gay Sons and Mothers, a nonprofit dedicated to exploring and chronicling the unique relationship between mothers and their gay sons, including the profound impact a mother can have on her son’s well-being.
Through intimate interviews and personal stories, the documentary examines the unique relationship between gay sons and their mothers, revealing how acceptance, understanding, and unconditional love can shape a man’s life. At the heart of the project is Rick Miller, founder and executive director of Gay Sons and Mothers. Drawing on years of interviews and research, Miller brings forward stories that reflect the complexity of coming out within families.
For Locher, the subject couldn’t be more personal. Growing up in the 1980s, Locher remembers navigating his sexuality without the representation younger generations would eventually have. “There was no Will & Grace or Glee,” he tells Handsome. “There was no defining what gay was.”
His experience was further shaped by his family’s history. Born to two Holocaust survivors, Locher remembers wrestling with his Jewish identity while growing up around people who sometimes made antisemitic jokes. His mother survived the Holocaust after a family of eleven risked their lives to hide her and his grandmother for two years. “Because of them, I’m here today,” he reflects.
Having inherited a family history shaped by survival, Locher would eventually discover another kind of freedom through his mother’s acceptance.
As a young adult, Locher found community through a group of gay friends who regularly gathered at a nearby townhouse. The home became a refuge where they celebrated holidays, spent weekends together, and experienced a freedom they couldn’t always enjoy publicly.
“We would park, not in the gay bar’s parking lot. We would park under an office building and run into the club for fear of being seen by people who knew us.”
Then came that Sunday morning. Returning home after a night with friends, Locher sat down with his mother, who told him she had something to ask. Nervous, he retreated to his bedroom and called a friend. “If your mother’s gonna ask you, tell her,” his friend advised. He returned to the table. His mother asked if he was straight. And just like that, the conversation he feared had finally arrived. “She was very accepting, and I was very blessed,” Locher recalls. “She asked and made it that easy.”
At the heart of Mom, I Have Something to Tell You is Rick Miller, founder and executive director of Gay Sons and Mothers. A licensed clinical social worker, Miller has spent decades exploring the unique relationships between gay sons and their mothers, a subject that resonated throughout his clinical practice and within his own family. What began as a series of recorded interviews with mothers and sons eventually grew into the documentary, bringing forward stories that reflect the complexities of coming out and the lasting impact of acceptance, understanding, and unconditional love.
Locher’s experience eventually connected him with Miller. After discovering the organization on social media, Locher invited Miller and several mothers and sons onto his online interview series, The Locher Room. Their collaboration eventually led to Locher joining the nonprofit’s board of directors.
Miller, a licensed clinical social worker, spent years documenting the experiences of gay sons and their mothers. His interviews and research ultimately became the foundation for Mom, I Have Something to Tell You. The documentary doesn’t suggest every coming out story ends in celebration. Some participants share experiences of rejection, estrangement, and being forced from their homes.
“Everybody’s story is different. Everybody’s journey,” Locher explains. For those fortunate enough to experience acceptance, the impact can last a lifetime.
“There is a unique bond, I think, between us,” he says of gay sons and their mothers.
The September 30 premiere will also feature Christy Kennedy Messina, president of the Gay Sons and Mothers board and mother of a gay son and transgender daughter. Following the screening, Miller and Locher will participate in an audience Q&A, joined by Jay Kuo, Chair-elect of the Human Rights Campaign and author of MA IN ALL CAPS, a memoir celebrating his mother.
For Locher, the film ultimately returns to something beautifully simple. The responsibility to love our children as they are. “It astounds me that kids can come out so early, but what’s even worse is parents who do not just love their children and accept their children for who and what they are.”
Perhaps the documentary’s greatest reminder is that coming out isn’t always about finding the courage to speak. Sometimes, it’s about having someone who makes it safe enough to finally tell the truth. And sometimes, that person is Mom.
Mom, I Have Something to Tell You premieres free online Wednesday, September 30, 2026, at 7:30 P.M. EST, followed by a live conversation and audience Q&A with Alan Locher, Rick Miller, and special guest Jay Kuo. As National Coming Out Month begins, the documentary invites mothers, sons, and families everywhere to reflect on the power of acceptance, understanding, and unconditional love.
WATCH THE DOCUMENTARY
Mom, I Have Something to Tell You
September 30, 2026 | 7:30 PM EST
Free online premiere and live audience Q&A.
