IN HANDSOME COMPANY: Carlton Jordan

Q. When you look back at the version of yourself who took that first risk — unsure, but determined — what do you think he’d say about the man you’ve become?

A. Wow. Leaving North Carolina for Howard—and then leaving D.C. for L.A.—was a huge risk. I just knew I had to be more than what I’d always known, which was Charlotte. I wanted to go somewhere I’d never been, chasing the dream of being a full-time creative. Twenty-two years later, that scared 17-year-old who spent a summer bouncing between hotels and friends’ couches would be GAAAAHT DAMN proud. And if I cried easily, he’d be sobbing like a MOFO. I don’t think young Carlton could’ve imagined how much taking risks would expand my world or how far it would take me. I’m still in awe of who I’m becoming.

Q. Every dream has a cost. What was the moment you realized you were willing to pay yours?

A. Man! The cost changes all the damn time, and inflation is kicking my dreams’ ass right now 😂. But I love every second of what I do as a writer, creator, and filmmaker. Still, it’s cost me a lot: time with family and friends, boyfriends, bouts of depression, doubt. Those things are expensive when you don’t have savings, aka healing. I’ve learned to constantly weigh the cost against the reward in my pursuit of success. I’ll never forget my first TV credit: a news segment on Brian McKnight of all damn people. When my family saw my name in the credits for the first time—as a Production Assistant—they went wild. As they’d just seen someone they actually knew, name on TV for about .5 seconds. That’s when I knew that what I’m doing has the power to change the lives of the people I love, and I was willing to pay the cost.

Q. You’ve produced stories that shaped the culture — but what’s the story you’re still writing for yourself behind the scenes?

A. Thank you. I know people will be studying RHOSLC for decades and decades to come!  But for real, I really hope the stories I make have a lasting impact. It’s strange, when you’re a struggling creative who leaves everything behind, even family, chasing success, access, and permission in an industry with no real roadmap, you end up constantly rewriting yourself just to survive. Honestly, and maybe sadly,  I never stopped to think about the story I was writing for me past professional success. COVID changed that. It forced me to ask: Who the fuck am I outside the hustle? What do I want to leave behind besides my work? Do I want a HUSBAND besides the one I write for myself in scripts? Like a REAL LIFE BOO? And how do I become a better human, not just a better creative? Quietly, behind the scenes, I’ve been trying to bring the same passion I have for storytelling to my own inner work—my health, my healing, and my growth.

Q.  Now that you’re living the dream you once worked toward in the dark, what does “handsome” look like to you — in discipline, in faith, in the way you carry yourself through the world?

A. Hmm, that’s a great question. I used to think “handsome” was purely physical, and I never really saw it in myself. But when I think about how I want to be intentionally perceived beyond my work, handsome looks different to me now. It’s a curious man, someone who knows how to rediscover and re-love himself, again and again. Someone who gives grace to himself and to others. Someone who can fucking laugh. And, let’s be honest, someone with a hell of a kiss game (I feel like I’m writing a dating-app bio 😂). As I pursue bigger and better dreams, this is the version of “handsome” I want to lead with.